Can I get sappy with you for a minute? This mama is really starting to comprehend how quickly life goes by....how fast our babies are growing up and how precious life really is. I have always loved being a mother, but something about this past year has really changed and just increased this motherhood joy x100. Do I have moments of frustration? Yes. But loving on Mia literally makes my heart explode. Watching my son in his first year of kindergarten? UGH, I cant take it. I LOVE it. I love watching him do his homework and practice writing his name. I love reading with him and just seeing him truly thrive in his classroom. And my oldest, Brooklynn. I love seeing her be the first one awake, already in her uniform and reading because she just cant wait to get to school. Maybe its the postpartum hormones and emotions that are still running rampant through my body. Or maybe I just have truly come to a place in life where I find pure joy in motherhood. But a few things that I think have a lot to do with it is my decision to step back from work.
A few years ago I was working all week long, weddings on the weekends, blogging, traveling for work etc. I called myself the "Yes Man". If I got a call for work, I said yes. Being a single mom before my husband and I met, I tasted the bitterness of not having money, not being able to provide for my own children and facing the stress of it every single day. It was horrible. So in an effort to "never have to feel that again", I said yes to everything. But guess what? It didn't work. We still ran into financial troubles, we still did not have an abundance of money and we still struggled. The lesson? Where was I placing my faith and trust? In myself. And that just doesn't work.
We have had such a busy summer with the move and trying to sort out renovations, unpacking, school shopping, family in town etc. But I am so looking forward to this year. I want to hold on to every single day with Mia, because she will soon be ONE and it is literally breaking my heart. I feel like I just had her! and just for some sweet memories...look at this baby when she was still fresh...
I think of all the sweet memories I have with Mia and from my two older babies and it is something that I just hold so dear to my heart. Motherhood is incredible. Motherhood is a gift. An absolute gift. And I cannot imagine my life with out these kids.
So excuse me while I go sneak my babies out of their beds to cuddle me in mine...because why not. They won't fit in between mommy and daddy forever. And I think this mama might be super heartbroken when that happens.